How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
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