Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize
