idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
