If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
