Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I have tasted many bathrooms
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
