so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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