you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
God I need to hump something, right now.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize