What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I need a hoe opinion
go on
soo... how was my night?
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
