the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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