i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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