From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
There r osticjed everywhere
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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