just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
