I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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