no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
