You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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