last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
