I'm so fucking centered right now
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
