He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
