she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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