so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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