Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
