what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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