i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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