I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
