Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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