Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Randomize
