Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Randomize
