Midget sex pt 2 tonight
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
