We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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