bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
