C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize