Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Boobs are out for the taking
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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