There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Randomize
