Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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