he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize