it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
