"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
