ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Randomize