'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
im having a threesome with these popsicles
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Randomize
