i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
smell my finger.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
