i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
