Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
