There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
