I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
