You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
