He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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