This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I believe in your delicious
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
