Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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