meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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