Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
