I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
